And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
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