so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize