If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
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