I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
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