State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Randomize
