I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize
