My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
I wanna passion pit in your ass
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
