I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
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