break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
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