Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
Randomize
