Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
