She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
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