K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Randomize
