We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
The ass gains better be worth it
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