glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
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Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
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No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
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