I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
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She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
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