Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
Randomize
