I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
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