i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
Randomize