what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
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