I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
