i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
Randomize
