He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
Randomize