4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
I miss vodka workout Fridays
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I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
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Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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