I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
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