Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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