i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Randomize