My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
