People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Randomize
