She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Randomize
