dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize