Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
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