check it out our google latitudes are spooning
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
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