Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (269): View more from Michigan

  Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (269): Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown http://tfl.nu/j7bk
  Replies (3) Good night (1731) Bad night (736)
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (814): First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half. http://tfl.nu/df8e
  Replies (27) Good night (4467) Bad night (1113)
• Favorite

  (434): View more from Virginia

  KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (434): KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS. http://tfl.nu/51z5
  Replies (24) Good night (5254) Bad night (868)
• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (832): Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth. http://tfl.nu/8o52
  Replies (17) Good night (820) Bad night (6736)
• Favorite

  (514): View more from Quebec

  He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (514): He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period. http://tfl.nu/yw8j
  Replies (18) Good night (725) Bad night (4740)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (630): Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle. http://tfl.nu/mxjx
  Replies (7) Good night (942) Bad night (5057)
• Favorite

  (309): View more from Illinois

  Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (309): Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me. http://tfl.nu/c51e
  Replies (7) Good night (1183) Bad night (2278)
• Favorite

  (941): View more from Florida

  Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (941): Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship. http://tfl.nu/y8rh
  Replies (21) Good night (5672) Bad night (1231)
• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (407): I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by. http://tfl.nu/944n
  Replies (10) Good night (614) Bad night (1389)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (513): It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world. http://tfl.nu/7ety
  Replies (4) Good night (1404) Bad night (524)
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (315): I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night http://tfl.nu/ggh6
  Replies (4) Good night (614) Bad night (1834)
• Favorite

  (917): View more from New York City

  she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (917): she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall" http://tfl.nu/c8ce
  Replies (2) Good night (1712) Bad night (548)
• Favorite

  (218): View more from Minnesota

  We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (218): We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand. http://tfl.nu/ljk5
  Replies (2) Good night (588) Bad night (653)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  omg his dad is hot

  (410): View more from Maryland

  ... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (412): omg his dad is hot (410): ... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives. http://tfl.nu/revq
  Replies (1) Good night (673) Bad night (361)
• Favorite

  (307): View more from Wyoming

  im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (307): im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight. http://tfl.nu/fph0
  Replies (0) Good night (371) Bad night (210)

Randomize