I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
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