I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
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