yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
