im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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