3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
Randomize
