I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
