my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize