He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
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