trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
Randomize