she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize
