chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Randomize
