Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
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