Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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