I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
This is the high leading the old right now
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
Randomize
