Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
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