Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Randomize
