when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
