we have pet lesbian snakes
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Randomize
